Quick Hits: WWE SummerSlam 2017

Justin C here with your SummerSlam results. So I was grilling for most of the preshow. I saw The Miztourage beat the Hardyz and Jason Jordan in front of about 50 people. So nothing new for the Hardyz since they performed in TNA. You can’t start your preshow at 5 and let people in at 4 or later. It is just stupid.

Neville won the Cruiserweight Title back from Akira Tozawa. Why do the Title change on RAW? Oh yeah, SHOCK VALUE. And they have no story telling whatsoever with that division so it doesn’t surprise me.

Elias Samson put on a great one man show. He asked Brooklyn when they lost their balls.

The Usos defeated New Day to regain the Smackdown Live Tag Team Titles. I think it was just below their match at Battleground. Some cool spots including the Usos tossing Xaiver to the outside then hitting a Samoan Drop. My guess is this feud is going to end inside Hell In A Cell in October.

They did a KFC commercial with a bunch of people dressed as Colonel Sanders. Then Shawn Michaels came out dressed as Colonel Sanders and jumped across the announce tables. I had to make sure I wasn’t on drugs.

John Cena vs Baron Corbin

-Corbin’s new intro tron has too many flames. It makes me think they want to turn him into Kane. Hopefully he doesn’t electrocute Cena’s balls.

-Corbin gets his under the ropes back in the ring clothesline in early on to get control.

-Corbin gets distracted with the crowd chanting “Where’s Your Briefcase” so Cena goes into FIVE MOVES OF DOOM mode. Corbin blocks the Five Knuckle Shuffle and hits a chokeslam/backbreaker combo for two.

-Cena knocks Corbin off the ropes and hits a Tornado DDT into a Five Knuckle Shuffle. Corbin escapes the AA and hits a Deep Six.

-Cena catches Corbin with a LARRIAAATTTOOO then hits the AA for the win.

WINNER: John Cena- The crowd really didn’t care for it because they like to booo Cena but they don’t care about Corbin. Corbin also jobbed to one AA. That can’t be a good sign for him. Match wasn’t great either. I think I am finally off the Corbin bandwagon.

Smackdown Live Women’s Championship: Naomi (c) vs Natalya

-Natalya slaps Naomi early on. Naomi then head scissors Natalya to the outside then hits a Blockbuster on the floor.

-They get on the apron then Natalya catapults Naomi into the post.

-Natalya keeps going for pins and yells at the ref after every one. Naomi leg sweeps Natalya off the middle rope.

-Natalya gets a Sharpshooter locked in. Naomi counters by tossing Natalya into the corner. Naomi goes for a split leg moonsault but Natalya gets her knees up. Natalya reapplies the Sharpshooter and Naomi taps.

WINNER and NEW Smackdown Live Women’s Champion: Natalya- I guess I’m okay with that. Match wasn’t anything great. Natalya has been around for awhile and deserves a proper reign. I’ve personally thought Naomi has been disappointing as Champ anyways.

Big Cass vs Big Show- Enzo In The Ring Above A Shark Cage

-Enzo rambled on and on and on about something before Cass came out. I’ve never been happier to see him.

-The crowd is completely dead. All I hear is Enzo talking and I just wish he would shut the hell up.

-Seriously, Enzo won’t shut the fuck up. Cass works over the broken hand of Big Show. The crowd starts a “boring” chant and for once I don’t have a problem with it.

-Cass kicks out of a left handed chokeslam. He slams Big Show’s bad hand into the post.

-Enzo takes his clothes off and oils himself up to get out of the cage. Joey Ryan should sue for gimmick infringement. Cass clotheslines him. Cass then hits a big boot and empire elbow for the win.

WINNER: Big Cass- Awful. Boring. Annoying. Enzo wouldn’t shut up. And Cass and Show just can’t have a good match together. What an awful first hour of SummerSlam.

Randy Orton vs Rusev

-Rusev jumps Orton while he is posing in the corner. He hits a fallaway slam into the barricade on the outside.

-The match starts, Orton moves out of the way of a Rusev charge and hits the RKO. And its over.

WINNER: Randy Orton- Well, any hope I still had left for Rusev is now gone. What a fucking shame.

RAW Women’s Championship: Alexa Bliss (c) vs Sasha Banks

-They brawl in the corner for a bit before the ref separates them. Alexa hits a hard right forearm then a crossbody off the top.

-Alexa applies a choke in the corner and lifts Sasha off the ground. She then hits her double double knees.

-Sasha is able to land a kick to the head and then block a Canadian Destroyer and throw Alexa into the corner.

-Sasha lands some running knees in the corner. They go to the outside and Alexa pulls out the ring skirt so Sasha awkwardly falls. Alexa throws Sasha shoulder first into the announce table.

-Alexa hits Twisted Bliss but Sasha kicks out. Sasha goes for the Banks Statement but Alexa breaks it up. Sasha reapplies the hold and Alexa taps out.

WINNER and NEW RAW Women’s Champion: Sasha Banks- Really wasn’t expecting that finish. Match was okay. It was the first match the crowd was semi-alive for. I would’ve kept the Title on Alexa til Bayley came back. But the crowd booed her earlier because that’s what is cool now, so maybe the WWE panicked and made the switch.

Finn Balor vs Bray Wyatt

-Finn goes right after Bray after the bell with rights and lefts. He takes out Bray with a clothesline on the outside.

-They go back to the outside where Bray hits a clothesline of his own.

-Finn blocks a Sister Abigail then hits a double stomp. He blocks a second one with a Slingblade.

-Bray does the Crab Walk but Finn don’t care. Another Slingblade and the Coup de grace for the win.

WINNER: Finn Balor- Not much to the match again. The crowd came alive for Finn but it was your typical run of the mill WWE match. Finn wins clean and since it is 50/50 now I’m sure we will have the blowoff at No Mercy.

RAW Tag Team Championship: Sheamus & Cesaro (c) vs Dean Ambrose & Seth Rollins

-Ambrose and Rollins clear the ring early on. But on the outside, Sheamus catches Ambrose with a Brogue Kick then Sheamus and Cesaro both catch Rollins and just toss him to the floor.

-The idiots in the crowd start bouncing a beach ball. So Cesaro runs into the crowd and rips it up. Good. I can’t fucking stand that shit.

-The heels still work over Rollins as they roll to the outside. Ambrose jumps off the top to break it up then Rollins finally makes the tag to Ambrose.

-Ambrose and Rollins hit dueling dives to the outside.

-Ambrose superplexes Sheamus then Rollins hits a frog splash. Cesaro breaks up the count.

-Cesaro counters a Dirty Deeds into a swing and then Sharpshooter. Rollins tries breaking it up but Sheamus hits a rolling senton. Ambrose rolls through but Cesaro applies a crossface. Ambrose rolls through again.

-Sheamus kicks Ambrose in the back then they hit a clothesline powerbomb combo off the top for two.

-Rollins breaks up a 3 count where it looks like the ref hit 3.

-Sheamus has White Noise set up with Cesaro on the ropes. Rollins hurricarranas Cesaro off the ropes into Sheamus. Rollins superkicks Sheamus then hits his knee trigger finisher on Sheamus then Ambrose hits Dirty Deeds for the win.

WINNERS and NEW RAW Tag Team Champions: Dean Ambrose and Seth Rollins- Finally a good match on the show. Of course, the crowd had to be idiots early on with the beach ball. It would have been funny if they bounced it around and missed this. Finishing sequence was well done. I hope Ambrose and Rollins get a long reign.

United States Championship: AJ Styles (c) vs Kevin Owens w/Shane McMahon As Referee

-Styles attacks Owens before the bell. Shane pulls him away. Owens goes after Styles and Shane pulls him away as well.

-Styles hits a nice running knee on the apron.

-KO catches Styles with a nice LARRIAATTTOOOO.

-KO hits his trademark cannonball and seated senton.

-Styles hits right hands then comes back with a neckbreaker. He then hits a sunset flip powerbomb in the corner.

-Styles hits the inverted 450 splash but Shane was checking on KO and he pulled Shane into it.

-KO hits a popup powerbomb but Shane is slow to make the count as he recovers. KO gets in Shane’s face.

-Styles applies the Calf Crusher but KO rakes the eyes to escape. KO then kicks AJ Styles into Shane. AJ applies the Calf Crusher and KO taps but Shane is on the outside.

-AJ yells at Shane so Shane shoves him into a rollup by KO for two.

-AJ catches KO with a forearm then a snap suplex in the corner.

-They exchange blows mid ring which eventually leads to a Styles Clash for two.

-KO hits a PopUp Powerbomb and Shane counts 3 but on 3 he sees AJ’s foot on the ropes.

-KO yells at Shane. Shane shoves him into a rollup for two. AJ hits a Pele Kick then a Phenomenal Forearm and Styles Clash for the win.

WINNER and STILL United States Champion: AJ Styles- The match wasn’t bad but it was all a match to setup an angle. Shane selling ref bumps like death was hilarious because we are also suppose to take him seriously as a wrestler when he is in the ring. Hopefully AJ moves on to someone else. But with so many Smackdown heels looking buried tonight, who is left?

WWE Championship: Jinder Mahal (c) vs Shinsuke Nakamura

-Nakamura’s entrance is always great.

-Nakamura plays mind games early on with Jinder.

-The Singh Brothers distract Nakamura as he is coming back in the ring so Jinder knees him off the apron to the outside.

-Jinder switches to his slow mat based submission offense that brings the match to a screeching halt.

-Nakamura connects on some kicks to the chest then a knee to the mid-section.

-Jinder dodges a Kinsasha and drops Nakamura on the ropes.

-Jinder goes into the post and Nakamura hits a knee to the back of the head. The Singh Brothers come in to distract Nakamura but he takes them out. Jinder hits the Cobra Clutch Slam for the win.

WINNER and STILL WWE Champion: Jinder Mahal- How are we suppose to take Jinder seriously if he only wins because of the Singh Brothers? Awful match. I can’t believe that happened.

WWE Universal Championship: Brock Lesnar (c) vs Roman Reigns vs Samoa Joe vs BRAUN Strowman

-Brock suplexes Joe and Reigns as Brock and BRAUN square off. They take out Joe and Reigns again. BRAUN tosses Lesnar into the corner like nothing then clotheslines him over the top.

-Joe applies the Coquina Clutch on Brock. Reigns comes in and spears Lesnar through the barricade. Joe drops Reigns on the announce table. BRAUN tosses Joe over the announce table. BRAUN running powerslams Brock through an announce table.

-Reigns spears BRAUN into the post. Joe runs out and takes out Reigns. BRAUN THROWS ANOTHER OFFICE CHAIR AT JOE. THen he slams Brock AGAIN THROUGH AN ANNOUNCE TABLE.

-BRAUN then tips over the last announce table on Brock. Brock gets taken out on a gurney.

-BRAUN picks up the steps then takes out both Joe and Reigns multiple times with it.

-Reigns takes out BRAUN and we get Joe and Reigns in the ring doing some basic wrestling.

-BRAUN comes back in and chokeslams both men.

-Brock comes back in and takes out BRAUN then suplexes Reigns and Joe. Brock applies the kimura lock but Reigns breaks it up with a superman punch. Reigns spears Lesanr but he kicks out.

-BRAUN powerslams Joe but Brock pulls out the ref. BRAUN does the same to Reigns but Lesnar breaks up the pin.

-Reigns spears BRAUN with Brock up in the powerslam position.

-Joe applies the Coquina Clutch. Brock counters to the F5. Reigns breaks up the pin.

-Three superman punches from Reigns. Brock hits the F5 and retains.

WINNER and STILL Universal Champion: Brock Lesnar- That match was great. The highlight of the show. BRAUN was a mega star. But the ending just kind of fell flat there. And now I’m pretty positive Brock is holding the Title til Mania. And that’s disappointing.

OVERALL: Both tag title matches and the main event were good. Everything else? A pretty big giant pile of shit. Nakamura losing like he did was ridiculous. Rusev was buried. Corbin looks like the dirt is being shoveled down on him. Both women’s matches under delivered. The main event can’t hide the fact that this was a pretty bad show. It probably ranks in the lower tier of overall SummerSlam events. The WWE needs a strong follow up on RAW and Smackdown to keep things interesting.

Until Next Time,

Justin C

Follow Me On Twitter @JCWonka